Secret Santa
by Tigger23505
Summary: Spock finds a gift for a shipmate.
1. Chapter 1

Secret Santa

October 15

Spock was convinced that Jim needed a new random number generator, a new hat or something. With the number of people in the command team, it made no sense that he would draw the same person every Christmas. While he could easily compute the odds, the math was just another proof of what he already knew. Spock suspected that Jim was manipulating the draw for his own amusement

As this was the third year, the problem was more interesting. The really easy gifts had already been found and given. This year it would take much more thought to find a gift that would stay within the rules.

The rules:

1) No gift could cost more than 20 credits.

2) Nothing risque.

3) No Alcohol.

4) Either practical or Humorous – unofficially there were bragging rights for gifts that managed to be both.

5) Gifts would be exchanged in person during to the December 24th team meeting.

Spock spent a great deal of time thinking about the gift. He came up with several ideas, which he checked with Uhura, to make sure that they were acceptable. Finally, he came up with the solution to his problem.

December 25

Staff Briefing Room

The command team was assembled for the Secret Santa gift exchange. Enterprise tradition was to begin the gift giving starting at the bottom of the seniority ladder. After much laughter, cheers and good natured ribbing all but two gifts had been given.

Spock walked over to Dr. McCoy and handed him a small package. McCoy opened it as though he were doing an autopsy, slicing the polystrips holding the wrapper closed. When the package opened McCoy found a pullover shirt with an electronic controller. There was a glowing green button on the controller, Bones pushed the button and a message scrolled across the shirt, "He's dead, Jim!" Bones clicked the button again, "I'm a doctor not a brick layer!" scrolled across the shirt. After another click, "Don't be so melodramatic. You were barely dead." Giving the button a final click, "Damn it Jim! Why do you have to be allergic to the universe?"

"Doctor, this is the full list of the twenty quotes the shirt will display." Spock handed McCoy a small envelope.


	2. Secret Santa Chapter 2

Secret Santa Chapter 2 by Starquilter57, beloved spouse of Tigger23505

October 15

Leonard McCoy stomped into his office. He wadded up the little strip of paper and threw it against the wall.

"Damn it all, that's the third time I've drawn him in three years. It can't be a coincidence!" he muttered to himself. "Jim must be rigging the game!"

The doctor poured himself a brandy, hoping a little alcohol might provide inspiration. He reviewed the Secret Santa rules.

No gift could cost more than 20 credits.

Nothing risque.

No alcohol.

Either practical or humorous. There were unofficial bragging rights for participants who found a gift that fit both of these categories.

The gifts would be exchanged at the Christmas Eve staff meeting.

"The dang hobgoblin is nearly impossible to shop for. I'm sure he finds the whole thing illogical, though it's hard to tell. I'm only ever certain of what he's feeling when he's pissed off. Somebody should come up with a Vulcan emotion detection device."

McCoy repeated that last sentence aloud, and then began to laugh, an evil sort of chortle. He poured himself another brandy, downed it quickly, then hurried off to find his friend Devi Nhegmi.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Dr. McCoy was convinced that in the history of the galaxy, no physician had ever been on time for a social event. Traditionally, the Enterprise Command Team began the gift exchange with the lowest ranking officer receiving his or her gift first. Then the recipients would follow the chain of command up. However, since the doctor had a last minute emergency, the Captain had stepped in.

Unfortunately, that meant that he had missed the look on Jim's face when Scotty had given him the Chastity Device.

Only the doctor and the First Officer had yet to exchange gifts. Spock walked over to McCoy and handed him a small, carefully wrapped package. Inside was a pullover shirt with a small controller. The shirt was programmed with twenty of the good doctor's most infamous quotations, any one of which could be displayed with the mere touch of a button.

Jim could hardly contain himself.

"That should be a real time saver, Bones."

Bones was smiling himself.

"Good work, hobgoblin. However, I've got a little something for you." He handed Spock a small box wrapped in candy cane paper.

Spock carefully undid the wrappings, then opened up an old-fashioned jewelry presentation box. Inside was a triangular pendant with a color key hanging on a small placard attached to the pendant's base.

It read as follows:

Black = Tense

Gray = Anxious

Amber = Nervous

Green = Neutral

Blue = Relaxed

Dark Blue = Very relaxed, romantic

White = Confused

Pink = Fearful

Yellow = Imaginative

Orange = Stimulated

Red = Excited

Purple = Passionate

Spock held the pendant in his hand. The color instantly changed from a "neutral" green to a "confused" white.

"Doctor, I do not understand the purpose of this item."

"Oh, I can see that, Spock. Well, what you've got here is a Vulcan Emotion Detection Device, or VEDD, as Nhegmi and I like to call it. The technology is based on a little 20th century novelty item known as the mood ring. We've been collecting data on you from your bio-tracker for the last few months. We've just made adjustments for your specific hybrid physiology and personal temperature range."

"Fascinating" said Spock as the pendant changed from a "confused" white to an "imaginative" yellow, and then to a "stimulated" orange.

"That is awesome! Let me see that!" Uhura nearly squealed as she set her drink down.

As she approached Spock, the pendant turned a bright purple.

A/N: Mood ring color guide adapted from


End file.
